People often get stuck in their problems because all they can see is the problem. Counseling can provide a different perspective that helps the client to focus on the solution thus reframing the problem. A third party who is objective can provide perspective that clients are unable to see.
Therapy is not meant to be just a feel good session. It is meant to be a collaborative process where the client and therapist work towards accomplishing the client’s goals. My goal is to help clients discover what is true about them and be able to embrace their inherent value and worth. During therapy you will find a listening ear and validation. While there may be times of facing difficult feelings, the therapeutic environment will be safe and secure.
Phone Online Counseling
Phone and online counseling is an option when specialized therapeutic services may not be available locally. As a certified Sexual Addiction Recovery Therapist and Cognitive Behavioral Therapist, counseling on the phone or online allows access to individuals and couples needing specialized expertise. While face to face contact is preferable, therapy is just as effective through technological means. My clients have found that their therapeutic goals are met online or over the phone.
Individual counseling provides the opportunity for people to discover their fears, face them and become more fully themselves. During the counseling process I focus on what defines the client, what they believe about themselves and how those beliefs shape their behavior. I shed light on what is true about their beliefs and help them discover their inherent value and worth. I focus on the solutions not the problems. Together with the client, we re-frame perceptions in light of discovered truth and create new perceptions that influence our feelings and thinking.
Intimacy in marriage is experienced three dimensionally; emotionally, physically and spiritually. Often couples find themselves in conflict when their anxiety rises resulting in emotional dysregulation. I help clients identify these feelings and discover how to regulate in order to find emotional balance. I help them find safety within the relationship to share their feelings while not being defined by what the other feels. Intimacy is restored when couples feel safe enough to be vulnerable with each other.
People exist in the context of relationships and within family systems that have specific dynamics. Change the organization of the family and presenting problems can be resolved. In family counseling, I approach therapy from the perspective that interactions between family members are transactions that can change and become more successful. Family systems theory suggests that often families do not want to disrupt the equilibrium of the family even when it is unproductive or unhealthy. I help families learn new ways to relate to one another free of negativity.
Men’s Sexual Addiction
Freedom groups incorporate a recovery program that provides accountability and practical application of the 12 steps. Participants work through all 12 steps together finding freedom from sexual addiction. These groups have the flexibility of being conducted weekly over the phone.
Men’s Intimacy Anorexia
Intimacy Anorexia Men’s Freedom group is a place where men learn how to engage their spouse, partner or other relationships without the anxiety that intimacy causes. This is a working group working through a 12 step program towards freedom from withholding the very intimacy that starves our close and intimate relationships.
Recent estimates show that nearly 12 million people (4.5%) suffer from sexual addiction in the U.S. alone (Carnes, 2001). Despite common misunderstanding, this addiction is not about “too much sex.” It is a serious problem in which one engages in persistent and escalating patterns of sexual behavior despite increasing negative consequences to self and/or others (SASH Web site, 2007). In dealing with sexual addiction, I help the client first address the addictive behaviors. Once a measure of sobriety is obtained, clients are able to begin working on the reasons they have used sex to manage the pain and stress in their life.
For many, addiction to pornography and other compulsive sexual behavior has destroyed their most important relationships. Recovery from sexual addiction is possible with the help of others. Seeking help for this issue requires the individual to come out of hiding and be willing to tell another their most shameful and dark secrets. Clients can expect to find an accepting environment where transparency is rewarded and freedom found.
Intimacy anorexia is the active withholding of emotional, spiritual, and sexual intimacy from our most intimate partner. It may also extend to other familial relationships such as children, siblings, and parents. This active withholding impacts relationships significantly regardless of pain to our self or other close relationships. I help couples discover how to be intimate working through a 12 step program towards freedom from withholding the very intimacy that starves our close and intimate relationships… Am I an Intimacy Anorexic…take the test
Depression and Anxiety
Depressive disorders constitute one of the most common and serious disorders seen in therapy. It is often called the common cold within mental health. While some treatment therapies prescribe anti-depressants, available research data clearly indicates that treatment outcome for psychotherapy is equal to that of drug therapy in cases of moderate and severe depression and superior in terms of reducing subsequent relapse. The most successful intervention is a both/and approach…both medication and therapy.
Depression can be very debilitating and is often misunderstood by clients and their families. The thoughts and beliefs about certain stressful events create a sense of hopelessness for people suffering with depression. In counseling, I implement a Cognitive Behavioral approach, while validating a persons experience helping them discover ways to re-frame negative thoughts and perceptions.
Grief & Loss
When dealing with loss, people often become depressed. Grief is a complex experience incorporating many mixed and contradictory emotions. People try to bring order and sense to their lives but during times of grief there is no order as feelings rise randomly. Helping clients cope with grief involves sitting with them through the pain while they experience their loss in a supportive and validating environment. We do not try to “fix” grief, rather experience it within healthy boundaries.